Hey guys, I just made my first story. I would like to know your opinions. The main theme is raceplay, white/mexican. So, if you don't feel comfortable with it, just ignore this
https://chyoa.com/story/My-White-Bully-Dominated-my-Mom.52393
Got a suggestion for you. Since your work is pretty hot and you asked for comments on reddit. Here's one way to turn up the heat IMHO.
To some extent you've already played off the contrast between how mommy dominates son -- versus how she gets dominated by antagonist. But the more you focus on this contrast from HER perspective -- instead of only how humiliated son is feeling, the more heat will get generated.
She's used to dominating smaller boys -- especially her son. And since antagonist is just another smaller boy, she can't begin to conceive, initially, that she might not be able to dominate him too. But, to her horror, she can't. It's not just the blackmail. He overpowers her physically, emotionally and sexually. She is shattered by how helpless she is against him in every way. This, of course, contributes to her extreme arousal. The utter humiliation of being not even man-handled -- but boy-handled. She struggles against this with all her might, with every ounce and fiber of her outraged motherhood. She is proud. She genuinely loves her son. She desperately wants to protect him. And yet, the more antagonist dominates her, the more she quivers and drips with arousal. She mewls and whimpers when he takes her, but, even when he's not present, it eventually gets to the point when the mere thought of her helplessness in his grasp causes her to involuntarily moan -- and her son to ask if she's feeling alright.
The hot consequence of all this, for her, is that she starts getting used to the idea of getting boy-handled. Used to and stimulated by it. Because of that, when alone with son, the interaction often starts with her acting subtly submissive. Enticing, flirting, provoking. But son is nowhere near alpha enough to take advantage. He is gentle, worshipful, solicitous. He's the same simp he's always been. And, at least subconsciously, that's frustrating for her. She doesn't wind up resenting her son, exactly -- but she certainly starts holding him in extreme contempt. It makes her feel powerful, to dominate, cuck and humiliate him. The contrasts and transitions between her helplessness with antagonist and her power over son, if handled vividly, can produce explosive heat. Way more than by focusing attention primarily on how humiliated son feels. The way she gets confused sometimes and acts submissive with son. The way she gets confused other times and tries to throw her weight around with antagonist. The way antagonist reminds her where and to whom she belongs.
There's potential for a lot more plot richness than you'll find elsewhere in the bully / mommy genre. For example, say son eventually snaps. Mom goes from being in powerful charge to submitting completely to son -- and part of her loves it. Son is a real man after all! Son also truly loves her. But can son possess mom like antagonist can? Can he stand against antagonist? Maybe he thinks he can. Maybe mom wishes he could. But can he really make her his private property the way antagonist does?
Does he even want to do that? Will she try to help son -- or will she prove unable to withstand antagonist's domination and betray son? Will their budding romance then be shattered? Hell -- this book will sell. Or get you lynched.