Ok, so to follow up on this.
I looked through the forum, and it seems centered around bullying and power imbalances, which i guess somewhat suits my current situation?. I'm currently 35 and i am having an illicit relationship with a younger man. He isn't a bully per se, more of a troubled youth. As a volunteer social worker, i help to guide young people to better paths. For him in particular, I understand from the people around me, and the friends of my child, that he comes from a broken family.
This is not his fault. I feel like he got dealt a bad hand in life, which is why, i tried to encourage him to leave bad influences around him, and continue his education. One thing led to another, and things got physical. I initially regretted it, due to age differences, and the imbalance of power, with my position and everything, but he cajoled me into meeting regularly.
I'm not sure what to do, since googling led to many condemnations and ethical and moral quandaries. Its hypocritical, posting here, but i feel its a last resort.
It's nice getting this out. Apologies if this is the wrong place to do so.
Thank you for sharing your experience. As you would've already read and understood, this forum is about niche fetish. There are people who liked to get cucked by their bullies and tormentors and there are people who bully. Not everything here is real. Not everyone wants to try this in real life. Which is why there's a fantasy section. People for whatever reason got attracted to this fetish can either enjoy reading about it or writing about it.
Looking at your story, I believe it's a moral conflict or a case of cheating and cuckolding if you're married. It nearly doesn't fit into this. There are other forums for that kind of stuff. But if you want to fantasize why are you attracted to this young guy, about his dominating nature, and whether or not you like it, develop feelings for this guy and let him bully your family members then you're more than welcome to write. And I hope you do.